Category: Holidays

Allow yourself to heal. What does that mean when grieving?

20/12/2017

Allow yourself to heal. -HealingForGrievingHearts.com

Allow yourself to heal

What do I mean by that?

When we are hurting lots of us have the tendency to hide inside ourselves.
We want to deal with all our feelings by ourselves. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn’t.

When you are grieving the loss of a loved one you might want to rethink how to cope with your feelings and pain.

Allowing yourself to heal means to create space that will help you heal.

That space can be nature.
It can be a corner in your home where you light a candle for your loved one.
It can be a get together with a good friend that doesn’t judge you for what you are feeling.
It can be a celebration of your loved one's life where memories are shared.

Allowing yourself to heal means to become active in your healing process. (click to tweet)

It means to step out or your own inside turmoil and transform it into a visible dialogue. This can be painting, journaling, rituals, and memory sharing.

The coming holidays might be a first step to try new possibilities. The most important part is to be gentle with yourself. I wrote a post last year about how to prepare for the holidays. You can find it here.

I am wishing you that you will find the space that helps you heal and that you will be surrounded by supportive family members and/or friends.

I am keeping you in my heart,
Jacqueline

The Healing Rituals course will launch on January 19, 2018.

Interested to get early access? Sign up here.
(You don't buy anything at this point.)

Rituals for your grieving heart

1/10/2017

Rituals comfort your grieving heart - HealingForGrievingHearts.com

Next weekend, we will celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada. It is a time of harvest, gratitude, and a time of family gatherings. 

Stepping into the upcoming Holidays is not easy when you have lost a loved one. A place at the table will be empty. It will be difficult at moments. Fill this seat with memories, stories of their life, or a gentle minute of reflection. Laughing and crying with others will help your broken heart.

I have talked many times about rituals. The coming Holidays might be easier on you, your family, and friends if you plan something special for these days.

Rituals help to connect and heal. 

The following I suggested last year here it is once more:  

Go for a walk together and take some colourful ribbons with you. Chose a tree and hang the ribbons on it. 

One ribbon for your love to the person that died. 
One ribbon including a wish for yourself or your family/friends. 
A third one filled with gratitude for this day together or...

Hang as many ribbons as you wish. Share your thoughts out loud or just hang your ribbons in silence on the tree.

 This is also a ritual that you can do by yourself if you feel more comfortable this way.   

Another ritual is to ask everyone to bring some candles to the festive table.

Have a big bowl filled with sand in the middle of the table.

Each guest lights a candle and shares a short memory or story of your loved one while adding the candle to the bowl. Don’t force anyone. Some might just want to light the candle in silence.
 
Tell your friends and family how you want to spend the Holidays. Be open to change your mind at the last minute.

  I am wishing you a gentle step into this new season.

Take good care, 
Jacqueline

PS: Ribbon ritual: If you don’t have any ribbons at home you might be able to find some at a local thrift store. Make sure you use fabric ribbons and not plastic ones. Nature will thank you. (smile) 

PSS: Give me a call. I am here for you. ☎️

How to prepare for the Holidays when you are grieving

1/12/2016

Listen to your grieving Heart - HealingForGrievingHearts.com

Are you prepared for the cheer, the family images of happy people, the songs that might remind you of better days?

If you have lost someone this year it might be the first Holiday Season without them.

You might experience a flood of feelings or go numb and feel nothing at all.

It can help if you start to prepare yourself for the coming days counting down to Christmas.

1. Think about what you can and cannot do this year

A well meant invitation to a concert or a tree lighting might be too much for you. Even if your friends and family try to cheer you up with the things that you always loved during this time you might feel overwhelmed and fearful to fall apart in public. Take good care of yourself and gently decline invitations that are too stressful.

2. Be honest

Who do you want to have around for Christmas? Talk to your friends and family members how you want to celebrate. Who else in your circle is grieving? Could you help each other? Be open to new ideas.

3. Accept help from others

It is difficult to ask for help from others. Sometimes it is even harder to accept help, especially if you have been in charge of the holidays in other years.

4. Prepare a ritual to honour your loved one

Buy their favourite flowers. Cook that special dessert. Go for a walk in nature and light a candle at a cherished place. Share stories and memories of your loved one.

5. Which traditions do you want to keep?

Your friends and family might try to change things up in an effort to help you. Be clear and honest about your feelings and what you want to happen.

Whatever you decide to do or not to do it is your truth. There is no right or wrong way.

Take good care and don’t hesitate to reach out if you feel the need to talk. I am here for you.

Take good care,
Jacqueline

For your interest:
The Healing Rituals course will launch on January 19, 2018.
Interested to get early access? Sign up here.
(You don't buy anything at this point.)

Thanksgiving Ritual for your Grieving Heart

27/9/2016

Healing For Grieving Hearts - Rituals help to connect and heal.

Summer has moved on and Fall has started in earnest today or at least it was cold enough to remind me of what will come.

In two weeks we are celebrating Thanksgiving in Canada. It is a time of harvest, gratitude, and a time of family gatherings.

Stepping into the upcoming Holidays is not easy when you have lost a loved one. Their place at the table will be filled with memories, stories of their life, or a gentle minute of reflection.

I have talked many times about rituals. The coming Holidays might be easier on you, your family, and friends if you plan something special for these days. Rituals help to connect and heal.

Perhaps you all go for a walk together and take some colorful ribbons with you. Chose a tree and hang the ribbons on it.

One ribbon for your love to the person that died.
One ribbon including a wish for yourself or your family/friends.
A third one filled with gratitude for this day together or...

Hang as many ribbons as you wish. You could share your thoughts out loud or just hang your ribbons in silence on the tree.

This is also a ritual that you can do by yourself if you feel more comfortable this way.

I have done it by myself and with my family and both moments have their own unique calming feel to it, even when the tears are streaming.

Important is that you tell your friends and family how you want to spend the Holidays and be open to change your mind at the last second. (smile)

I am wishing you a gentle step into this new season.

Take good care,
Jacqueline

PS: If you don’t have any ribbons at home you might be able to find some at a local thrift store. Make sure you use fabric ribbons and not plastic ones. Nature will thank you. (smile)
PSS: If there are children involved you could add glass beads to the ribbons to add more colour.

Thinking of all the Mothers

8/5/2016

Today is Mother’s Day.

For the last two years I felt down when all the shop windows would remind me over and over that my mother wasn’t here anymore.

This year it has changed. I feel thankful for all the years we had together, the laughters we shared and the heavier discussions about different opinions. (smile)

I feel happy for my friends that are able to share this Mother’s Day with their mothers or being celebrated as mothers by their own family.

While sending wishes to some friends through Facebook I saw a post by Heather Plett . Heather had shared CBC Radio’s post.

I had a listen and I want to share it with you too.

It is a documentary by Rachel Matlow called ‘Dead Mom Talking’. Don’t get scared by the title. (smile)

Rachel took care of her mother and was able to record her before she died last July. They talked about death, the grief and sadness that follows.

Please have a listen to this loving and deeply touching documentary.

You can find it at CBC radio: http://bit.ly/24F2CUk

Hint: The LISTEN button is under the very first image.

I’m sending you lots of love.

Take good care,
Jacqueline

PS: I offer free Grief Relief sessions by phone. I will help you find a new clarity, a plan for powerful next steps on your healing path, and relieve of unresolved feelings. (value $300)

Take out your phone now and call me. (smile)
You can reach me at 01-902-237-5011 to make a free call appointment or send me an email at Jacqueline(at)HealingForGrievingHearts.com.

Happy Holidays

22/12/2015

Love and Healing for a blessed Holiday Season from HealingForGrievingHearts.com

May the coming days be filled with light and healing.

Your loved ones are with you in your heart and your memories.
Celebrate them, talk about them, and if you feel like it prepare a little gift for them. (smile)

I always buy my mother's favourite flowers and in my mind's eye I see her smile.

I wish you a blessed Holiday Season with supportive friends and family that are there for you when you need them.

From my heart to yours,
Jacqueline

Sign up here http://eepurl.com/4S8G1

Create a ritual...

8/12/2015

Candles, chorals, green needle branches with red ribbons, every day little gifts till Christmas Eve, and the smell of cookies being freshly backed. This is what I remember from my childhood.

What I am missing most next to my mother is the home baked Christmas cookies. My mother was a master in cooking and baking and we always helped kneading, decorating and eating them as we went along.

I am a strong believer in rituals and the comfort they can give you.

Every year I am falling short on my ‘would like to do’ rituals before Christmas. (smile) With it comes often the feeling that I am letting my mother down by not continuing her legacy she had instilled in us.

While I’m writing this I realize that the memories of her and her way of bringing light, humor, and warmth into my life comforts me to this day.

Perhaps you and I have to become still.

Instead of stepping into a rush of activity it might be better just to reflect on these warm and beautiful moments that we shared with our loved ones.

It might become a new ritual to talk about all the things my mother did to make Christmas special. (smile)

Do you want to give it a try as well?
Let me know how it went.

From my heart to yours,
Jacqueline

November 11th, 2015

11/11/2015

Share your memories to help you move forward in your grieving process.

Holidays are coming our way.

With them there might be even more reminders of the times we had
with our loved ones.

But instead of dreading these reminders I am challenging you to embrace them.

Yes, step gently into your fun and sad memories.

Share them, laugh about them, write them down and share them at a family dinner or with friends. Did you notice that I wrote share them twice? (smile)

At first, you might find it difficult to share your memories. Every time you do it the memories become lighter, more colourful, perhaps even more joyful. You might even find yourself crying and laughing at the same time.

Will it be easy? Probably not.
Will you enjoy it? Perhaps not always.
Will you feel more at ease? Perhaps.

You can only find your own answers by stepping into the challenge and share your loved one’s life with others.

Let me know how it goes at my website.

From my heart to yours,
Jacqueline

New Year Greetings

31/12/2014

http://www.healingforgrievinghearts.com/comfort-and-compassion.html

May the new year bring you new connections, good health and supportive friends.

All the best to you,
Jacqueline

Holiday Greetings

24/12/2014

Love and grief are deeply connected. HealingForGrievingHeart.com

You might get ready right now to be with friends or family over the next couple of days or you might have decided to take it calmer this year and be by yourself.

Either way I wish you a blessed Holiday Season with a support system that is there for you when you need it.

All the best to you and yours,
Jacqueline

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