Category: Shame

Shame, Loyalty, Rituals and more...

14/3/2017

Asking for help and surrounding yourself with supporters is sometimes necessary to reach a new peak. HealingForGrievingHearts.com

Today I was looking through my blog posts. I realized that there are some great ones. (smile)

You might have missed them.

I leave it up to you to dabble in them or just ignore these pointers.

How Shame can stop you on your Healing path.
Grieving brings up many overwhelming feelings. Shame can be one of them. I share thoughts inspired by Elizabeth Gilbert.

Does the Feeling of Loyalty keep you from Healing?
This post is about loyalty and what it can mean to your healing process.

Do I need art therapy/counselling?
Most of us don’t need outside help from an art therapist to get through the grieving process. So when should you look into it?

What is your life’s calling?
I am giving a short overview how it came about that I chose my profession/calling as an art therapist.

Special Days in your life: My mother’s birthday.
It is just that a look at my mother’s birthday and the rituals that I created to honour her and heal my broken heart. I would like to inspire you to create your own rituals.

Wisdom Grows in Quiet Places
This is a post about stillness.

I hope you will find something in this list that will make you feel less overwhelmed and more connected to your own unique healing path.

Like always you can get in touch if you want to speak or have questions. I am happy to answer your call or email.

Take good care,
Jacqueline

PS: If you like to talk to someone outside your inner circle about the grief you experience click on the phone and make an appointment for a free call. ☎️
This free offer is open to former Healing for Grieving Hearts clients too.

How shame can stop you on your healing path

21/4/2015

Today, I am celebrating the rain in Nova Scotia. (smile) The rain will help melt the snow that has obscured the growth of plants and delayed spring. Finally the blanket of white is lifting. Green is starting to appear and other colours will join nature again - soon - I hope.

Last week I read a Facebook post by Elizabeth Gilbert about shame and especially tribal shaming.
From Elizabeth's post:
A tribe being your family, your religion, your neighborhood, your nationality, your culture, etc.
Simply put: Our tribe of origin tells us who we are.
Our tribe tells us what to believe and how to behave.
Each tribe is governed by its own rules. These rules constitute the honor code that defines every tribe’s essence....

You can find Elizabeth’s post at http://on.fb.me/1E0abLL It is a long post but it is worth your time to read it all. She also explains how to step out of the shame circle. (You don’t have to be on Facebook to read it.)

Her post resonated deeply with me and coincided with stories I have heard from women I work with.

One woman told me, that she went to a potluck supper in her neighbourhood after a year of experiencing multiple loses and lots of healing work. It took her a lot of strength to step out and join. But then people wouldn’t speak to her. They would avoid being near her and one person even said in a loud voice, that she was surprised to see her at the event. My client got the message: "Shouldn’t you be at home grieving?” first she felt angry and then she felt ashamed. In this instance all her strength and trust that she had built disappeared. It took her a while to step out again.

The tribe we have been born in, the one we live in will determine rules that define the tribe’s essence. If we step outside the rules we might face adversity and puzzled looks.
We might even feel ashamed that we don’t fit in anymore.

What if your tribe supports the following rules:

Grief is something private and shouldn’t be shared.
A mother that has lost her child will never be happy again.
A woman that has lost her husband and is still grieving after 2 years is a drama queen.

or they could be:

Grief is something we share and heal together.
A mother’s grief is sacred and we welcome her returning smile into the world.
Grief is unique and we accept that everyone is different and that there is no time frame.

Sometimes it is good to have a look at our own tribal rules and to decide to no longer hurt others and ourselves through those rules.

In her post Elizabeth Gilbert explains how to overcome our shame and live more healthy and happy again. http://on.fb.me/1E0abLL
(I am not affiliated with her in any way. I just felt that she shares a very important message for all of us.)

Take good care on your healing path.

Love and blessings,
Jacqueline

Shame, Loyalty, Rituals and more...

How shame can stop you on your healing path

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