The last month has been heartbreaking.
You remember that our cat wasn’t well in the spring. She bounced back and we thought everything was OK. We thought/hoped that she had gotten over the hump and that she would live with us for another couple of years.
A month ago, she didn’t come home from her day outside. Over the last couple of years, she always stayed very close to the house. And even closer since she didn’t feel that well.
She always heard when I started to cook supper.
Immediately, I would have company in the kitchen.
She would wait for us to sit down for our meal. I don’t know when it started but over the last couple of years, she would get a few drops of cream on a small old plate on the floor. And we all ate together. (smile)
Later, she would spend the evening on one of our laps.
This isn’t happening anymore, because a month ago she didn’t return home.
We searched everywhere. We talked to neighboors, called all the shelters and vets, put up posters, and listed her missing on the local FB group.
We are coming to terms with the fact that she will not return. That she might have followed nature's call and went into hiding to die.
Every evening our heart breaks a bit more because she isn’t around anymore to share a meal with us.
Love is a huge gift and she has touched us deeply over the last ten years.
We are grieving the loss of our little companion. The loss of our fun times together, our rituals, our connection, and her trust that she gifted us with.
Our love for her will always be a part of us.
I am humbled again by my own grief that has enveloped me. I know it will get easier but we will always miss her and love her.
Take good care,
PS: I will take a few weeks off to recharge, traveling around Nova Scotia with friends, and spend some time in my art studio. (smile)
You can always reach me by email at jacqueline(at)healingforgrievinghearts.com